fat-phobia

Americans are afraid of fat.

We spend vast amounts of money on gyms and on fat-free foods and diet pills. We get all up in arms if someone calls someone else fat, as seen in this blog post by Dick Cavette, or even the comments to this NYTimes blogpost by Tara Parker-Pope about the importance of fitness in emergencies. Fat people sit around stuffing their faces all day! say some, and nuts to them if they can't get down the stairs! Cruelty! trumpet the others, and how would you feel if someone left you to roast in a fire? Admittedly, Cavett's mention of Nazis and Mafiosos in the same breath as the obese is a little over-the-top, but he's from a generation less likely to grasp for slights and victimizing remarks.

We're a nation of fad dieters and gym rats and couch potatoes, obsessed with celebrities who are thin to the point of appearing malnourished. We get riled up about clothing sizes, about portion sizes, about video games that will supposedly keep us fit. We watch "The Biggest Loser". We tell each other, "Of course you aren't fat!" We're mostly lying.

Why are we afraid to be called fat? In India, salespeople would look me up and down and give me a size bigger than I asked for. "Big size!" they'd insist. The local population was much slimmer. The Indian-American girl on my study abroad program was thrilled that at long last she wasn't being "penalized" by being made to pay the same price for her smaller, less-fabric-intensive clothing. The French didn't care enough to remark on my size, but I had trouble finding jeans that I liked (this did have something to do with the fact that I'm not big on rhinestones or pre-ripping, though).

I'm a fat girl. I've always been a fat girl. At five foot three and 165 pounds, there's no way you could call me normal weight. This is not to say that I'm not healthy - I don't have breathing or joint problems, and my cholesterol levels are fairly enviable. I eat pretty well - not too much, mostly vegetables (I can't help but think that Michael Pollan would be slightly proud and slightly dismayed, given that I'm not an omnivore). I don't have to shop in the plus size section and my BMI doesn't qualify me as obese. I don't consider myself unattractive. The reason I'm overweight is because I'm lazy. It's only in recent weeks that I've started going to the gym regularly. Though I played outside as a kid, it was mostly dreamy introspective games that involved building tiny playgrounds out of twigs and aquarium pebbles, not running and jumping. I wish I'd kept playing soccer after second grade, because it might have instilled some healthier gym habits in me. I wish I could say that I have a grand health plan in mind with all these gym hours, but really I just like the look of my collarbones, and I'd like to be fit enough to be less sweaty when I work out.

I suppose being overweight is something of a vicious circle. It is irritating to go to the gym and see all the skinny girls bouncing along on the ellipticals at two miles an hour, as if they don't have to work at it, or the massive guys heaving massive weights around on their massive shoulders. It is hard to schedule that treadmill time into your day. It isn't entertaining to diet or do crunches. And the heavier you are, the harder it gets to convince yourself to do something about it.

Why are we so afraid to be called fat? Sure, fat kids get bullied. But skinny kids get bullied too, and bookworms, and poor kids, and all sorts of kids. Children are cruel at times. I don't really buy the argument that a bunch of five-year-olds can ruin someone's life forever. Fatness shouldn't imply a lack of mental acuity or a dearth of social skills, but it seems to. Maybe I just didn't experience these damaging taunts because in addition to being the fat girl, I was the smart girl, and you don't want to alienate the person whose help you want with your homework.

Listen up, Americans: we are fat, we do need to get off the couch, and we need to stop playing the victims and acting offended that the rest of the world thinks we're porky, with our Twinkies and our burgers and our spread-out towns that make it inconvenient to walk anywhere. I'm not going to go so far as to say that fat people endanger society, but they do make us a source of (more) amusement for the rest of the world. Sure, some people have gland problems or other health conditions that contribute to their weight, but most don't. It isn't a moral judgment when someone points out that you're overweight. Someone might be implying that your will is weak or your motivation is lacking, but I wouldn't bet that way. Fat is a fact.

Meanwhile, skinny people (and don't think I believe that all of you just have high metabolisms), it's not really your place to be making people feel disgusting and awful. Exposed ribs aren't what I want to see at the beach, so if you and all the celebrities can just eat a sandwich now and again, I think we'll all be better off.